A New Perspective: Why Things Are Hard During Pregnancy

An interesting pattern has evolved in my life, mainly that of everything going crazy when I’m trying to do something good. When I got married things were crazy, and I mean crazier than just planning a wedding. I’m trying to finish school right now and family problems are vying for my attention, distracting me from doing my best. And now that we’re expecting our first baby, a previously stable financial situation has suddenly seemed to spiral out of control.

To some people these occurrences might seem like life in general, or fate, or whatever, and I agree that they’re definitely part of Life’s rollercoaster. But G said something to me today that helped me see things from a different perspective.

We’re currently facing the decision to sell our car or dump a lot of money into it just to get it passed for registration in April. After taking a look at our needs, expenses (babies are expensive…) and income for the next year, you can imagine that we both felt pretty discouraged.

After a few minutes of silent worry, G turned to me and said, “You know, I’m not surprised things are going bad with the car.” I looked up at him in surprise and he continued. “We’re having a baby. We’re bringing life into this world. Of course Satan will try and do everything he can to make it as difficult as possible.”

I don’t know if that just pulled out my competitive side, or my pre-momma-bear side or what, but after he said that, suddenly I went from feeling like the defeated loser to the offensive lioness.

The Refiner’s Fire

All must pass through a refiner’s fire, and the insignificant and unimportant in our lives can melt away like dross and make our faith bright, intact, and strong.

Growing up as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I’ve been taught from a young age that one of the reasons bad things happen to us is to help us grow. We relate this idea often to “the refiner’s fire.” I felt defeated today, but my husband reminded me that there is a battle to be fought, a war to win, and a forge to get through. We can’t let the adversary gain the upper hand, especially when we’re trying our best to do what’s right.

Thank you, Sweetheart, for sharing what you know and reminding me that now we have a little someone to fight for.

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© No Nightlights by Kyra Sutherland

2 thoughts on “A New Perspective: Why Things Are Hard During Pregnancy

  1. Just one more perspective, perhaps instead of trying to blame things on a nonexistent devil, one should just look at the cause And effect of ones own desicions- getting married while still in school, choosing to get pregnant while still in school and not having a real financial foundation to begin with makes things difficult. I’m not saying this is right or wrong, it just is…Unfortunately some religions teach us to blame a “devil” instead of learning about self, our own mind, the way we think and believe, which therefore forms our decisions creating our own consequences. “Good or bad, easy or hard” – if we can learn to challenge our own thought patterns and believes that are not necessarily true, this is always a good place to take responsibility for what happens in our life. I know this is not in line with your current thinking, and may anger you, but my intent is to offer another way of thinking – so you can stand in your own power – I usually try to keep my opinions to myself, but when you post this for the public to see, sometimes I just can’t help myself ?

    1. Thank you for sharing your perspective! I personally do believe in an entity that would see us fail, but I realize that that is a personal belief. I agree that taking responsibility for one’s actions is a must, and I’m glad that my decision to get married and our decision to get pregnant while still in college was based on more than just a whim. We both felt it was the right time and the right place, and even though it’s been quite a rollercoaster, I wouldn’t change any of it.

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